Arschgeige - assviolin - a heavy insult
Fußhupe - foot horn - a small dog
Egal wie dicht du bist, Göthe war Dichter. - No matter how drunk you are, Goethe was a poet - Pun: “dichter” also translates to “more drunk”
fuchsteufelswild - foxdevilswild - really angry

(via perfectruler)


this was probably one of the saddest moments of my childhood


(via totally-relatable)


*tries to get eight hours sleep in 3 hours*

(via majorcartr)


Perks of dating me: I’ll let you sleep on my boobs

(via reuxfur)


"No matter how bad you fuck up at work, you didn’t fucked up this bad"

(via chakramattack)


No I’m not smiling at you I’m smiling at your dog don’t look at me

(via fluorescentbeigedreamer)


this is one of the cleverest things I have seen in sometime

(Source: artjcf, via germanzombiegirl)

(Source: somnifik, via iliketheladiess)


cant wait for natural selection to take out slow walkers 

(Source: batmanglijs, via mikkelsenism)

(via spiderosborn)

(via spiderosborn)

(via drofsirreb)

(Source: lizgillies, via wildethings13)

Maisie: [At the auditions] I had gotten along really really well with Sophie, and I just remember her being super tall. After everything we do, she’s like “Aw you’re really cute.” And I’m like “Yeah, I’m only one year younger than you.” I came out of the audition and said to my mum, “Even if I don’t get the part, I really want that girl to. She’s really cool.” But, um, yeah, we got on really really well.
Sophie: Aw, you’re really cute.
Maisie: Still, only one year younger than you.

(Source: imgonnaeditstuff, via miss-maisiewilliams)